Tuesday, June 09, 2009

This May Take A While....

No more pencils, no more books, no more bullies dirty looks.

Or something like that.

Summer couldn't have come fast enough for us. I usually get pretty misty-eyed at the end of the school years anticipating my child climbing farther up the your-kid-won't-be-young-much-longer ladder, but this year, it was just, can we get this over already??

Jacob has always been a target for bullies. Even when he was Elizabeth's age the bigger kids would come over to make fun of his exuberance and try to steal his toys. I could handle that, though, pretty easily. We went inside and stayed away from the wretched little creatures, but now, well, as much as I'd like to, I just can't keep him inside.

This whole school year Jacob had his own personal bully. His teacher was the first to alert me to the situation way back in September and she assured me she was taking care of it. And she did. For the most part. Then bully boy got some friends, lackeys if you will, and things got a little worse. Not only did Jacob have to avoid Bully Boy 1, he was now trying to stay away from Bully Boy 2, Bully Boy 3, and Bully Boy 4. They'd corner him at recess and call him names, trip him, spit on him and then deny it whole-heartedly to the recess teacher whose stellar advice to Jacob was, "Don't play with those boys" before she'd turn around and continue gabbing with the other equally competent recess teachers.

So I'd write a note-send an email-make a phone call-arrive at butt-crack of dawn for a conference every couple of weeks to let the classroom teacher know what was going on when I went ape-shit crazy on those kid's parents. The teacher was as helpful as she could be, but really, she never witnessed the BIG things. Those little monsters were smart and saved their pure meanness for the lazy, minimum-wage making, I-don't-know-anything-about-children teachers.

But then a few weeks ago Jacob sat down to do homework and says to me, "C made me go behind the shed and fight him," all matter of fact because, well, it's a matter of fact that this damn kid is going to do something crappy to him every day.

And I was like, "Oh, no he di'nt"



And after rehashing the facts over and over to make sure I was getting the real truth getting the rest of the story, it seemed Jacob told on Bully Boy 1 for walking up the slide (which here I just shake my head because, DUH, quit tattling unless you've been hurt! How many times do we have to tell you this?) and I guess the highly effective recess teacher told him, wait for it...wait for it...."Don't do that" and apparently just being told not to do something really ticked this kid off or, yeah, maybe the whole tattling thing, but still, he and his lackeys told Jacob to meet them behind the shed. Why he actually went is still unclear, but I'm thinking Jacob in all his immature innocence probably didn't know that was what was in store for him.

And it was at this point in the story my head started spinning around and green smoke started blowing from my ears.

"Did they actually touch you?" Yes.
"Did they hit you?" Yes.
"Did they punch you with fists?" No. But they all used their karate moves on me.

Uh. Okay.

And so after a brief demonstration I was able to determine that Jacob was karate chopped with hands and kicked in the gut by these self-proclaimed karate experts.

He had no obvious scarring from his first "fight", but what happened next is what really pissed me off:

"Did you tell the recess teacher?" Yes. I told her that C and G and K were fighting me and she called them over and told us all to just not play together anymore and not to tell Mrs. S because she'd just be mad at us so it would just be a secret. And then she made me sit out the rest of recess while the other boys went and played on the swings.


And the next morning I was up at that school, DRESSED, at 7:30 waiting for his classroom teacher......


Sadie said...

I cannot wait to hear the rest of this story.

I hate mean children.

I shouldn't hate children, I guess.

I hate when children are mean.

Krys72599 said...

I can't wait until you finish this story.
I know this is less than an admirable attitude to have, but if you want me to hold 'em, you can use YOUR karate moves on bullies 1, 2, 3 and 4...
You obviously have a very innocent young son, and I really, really would like him to stay that innocent, but he might just get the crap knocked out of him if he does...
I'm so glad I never had to deal with this. I'm going to go home tonight and ask my husband (he teaches K-8 gym) what he recommends. (He's a pro - he's been teaching for 35 years!)
If he has any words of wisdom, I'll be in touch...

ChupieandJ'smama said...

I wish we lived by each other. Our boys could play together and have fun, and not be bullied. My son has had issues too. And the bullies mom CALLED me to say that HER son feels like mine is picking on him. The WHOLE class feels picked on by her son. But she calls me. And not wanting to make waves I say "Well, I'm sure both boys are at fault and it's probably just a personality conflict and maybe they should just play with others for a while". And she says "NO. YOUR SON HURTS MY SONS FEELINGS". Really? Is that because my son doesn't let yours punch on him? OY! Thank goodness for summer break. Except they are on the same baseball team. I just lectured him tonight about not going near that boy. Not touching him, talking to him, or looking at him. This way he can't get blamed for a single thing.

Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog said...

What a load of crap. (Not you, the system). All of those boys are being taught that bullying is ok to a certain degree. Even the bullies are being given the short-end here...

Poor Jacob. And I cannot imagine how hard that was for you! What's the situation looking like for next year?

Ruby Red Slippers said...

This is just horrible. I can't bear this for you all. I hope you are going to tell me this ends with it being resoloved-

Dana said...

Some kids can be so cruel. Why is it that kids have to learn such ugly things at such a young age now. It's just heartbreaking. It sounds like you're right on top of things. I am looking forward to hearing how the "meeting" went. Poor Jacob....it sounds like he's an awesome kid.

Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog said...

Hey, you won the Webkinz Jr giveaway! Email me your email address, and you can get started.


Leslie said...

OMG that is horrible!!!

I can't belive how mean kids can be... and that the adults are punishing the bullied, not the bully!!

BethGo said...

Oh no. This is so sad. poor Jacob.

Miss Hope said...

Oh dang. Oh man. I so got your back if you need me.

Lynsey said...

man alive! Finish the story!!! I beg of you!