Tuesday, October 31, 2006

As Homer Simpson Would Say........Aaaahhhh

I just discovered this.

After swearing off such bypass inducing entrees and eating salad and plain potatoes for weeks, I couldn't hang on any longer. I will need much will power to not pass through that drive thru again. If there is a such thing as heaven in a bun, I have found it.

I guess that makes this my Tuesday Treasure.

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Is It Too Much to Ask?

I just wanted one nice pumpkin patch picture of my two boys. Here is the result. I don't think I will be sending out photos with the Christmas cards this year, I might keel over from that stress.

Friday, October 27, 2006

Fuzzy Picture Friday

What a difference five weeks makes!

I went this week for my nuchal translucency scan because I am old as Methusalah and what the hell am I thinking having a baby at my advanced maternal age? If you have never heard of the NT, it is basically a sharper ultrasound where they measure a neckfold and search for a nasal bone to determine your risk for having a child with chromosomal disorders.

Good news! We have nasal bone and low measuring neckfold! BUT, we have an unfused amniotic sac that may or may not be a signal of chromosomal defects. I go back in four weeks for another scan and to donate more blood and should find out something definitive the week after Thanksgiving.

I am really not stressed about this, even after googling this condition (damn google) and finding that it could lead to Trisomy 18
and even fetal death, I accept what it is: something I cannot change and will deal with if and when the time comes. Plus, the doctor told me he was almost sure he was looking at a healthy baby, but he could make no promises, and he was just such a nice guy I have to trust that. I love this doctor! He's not my regular one, he's a maternal fetal specialist, but if he delivered babies I would drop my OB in a minute, even if he did keep me waiting for two hours. He was a dead ringer for William H. Macy and who doesn't love William H. Macy?

But as for the baby, it is 7.3 centimeters long and measuring right on target which puts me right about 14 weeks. It's heart rate was 159 and it can move it's arms and legs and roll around. I will tell you that I finally had a dream about this baby, at least I suppose it was this baby, and I got a gender and a name BUT I am keeping it to myself because I like having that little secret just for me. Not that it is solid information because I do not have special powers to dream the future, but who knows, we shall see.

Fourteen down, twenty four more to go!

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things about Adam

1. Adam was born January 23, 2005, not January 24 which is when my husband thinks it is. He is 21 months old.

2. He does not say a word, yet he is easier to understand then his brother at this age.

3. He uses sign language a lot. I have lost track of all the signs he knows, but he has one for just about everything and will make up his own sometimes.

4. His favorite foods are bananas and Sara Lee Blueberry Crumble bread. Never in my life would I have thought I would pay so much for a loaf of bread.

5. He smiled the day he was born. I am not lying, ask anyone who was there.

6. He loves cars and trucks. He must carry a handful at all times. His current happy pasttime is to throw them all in the dog's water then wipe them down with a wipe. I have decided that this is okay because I can finish dinner and possibly fold laundry during those times.

7. He eats chapstick while I am blind in the shower.

8. He has a hair fetish. Specifically my hair. He needs to hold on to a hunk of it anytime he is tired or cranky or upset.

9. He can throw a ball better than some big kids, none of that baby tossing either. He has the technique down and no one taught it to him, he just knows how. He's the next Marc Bulger I just know it. Mama always wanted good seats at Mountaineer games.

10. He still wears size 2 diapers and I think he will until he is out of diapers. He is extremely skinny and has absolutely no rear end.

11. He climbs everything. He currently uses a Little Tikes refrigerator as his mode of transportation, but anything works, the intellitable, a kitchen chair, laundry baskets. He will get to anything if he wants it badly enough.

12. He has really long toes. I saw them first in an ultrasound and was just amazed then and one of the first things I did when they brought him to me was to unwrap him and check out those toots. They serve him well through all his monkey antics.

13. He's a mama's boy, always has been, and I love that. He is getting more independent now, but he still seeks his mama when he's hurt or sad or not getting his way.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. Sadie

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Sunday, October 22, 2006

I Can Be Weird Too.....

But, geez louise, is Sadie weird! LOL

Sadie tagged me again and since I totally blew off the last one with all that bypass saga going on I figured I would give this one a shot just for her.

This mission, if you choose to accept it, is to list nine weird things about yourself and then tag nine more people to do the same, so watch out, you might be next. Drum roll please..........

1. I dream at night, at times, about my two college friends who are now deceased. When I wake up it was like I really was there with them and it takes me a while to figure out I wasn't. We are usually sitting at a bar, drinking beer, and having a grand time and then I will always turn to them and say, "Hey, you're dead!" and they say "yeah, but it's nice getting out now and then." Here recently they say "so, you're pregnant" and we all have a good laugh and order another pitcher.

2. If we go to a ball game or a movie or anything along those lines and they sell the big pickle, I MUST buy the big pickle. I am so thrilled to see that big pickle in it's wax wrapper I can barely contain myself, BUT, I do not buy big pickles at the store or eat them at home, no idea why.

3. I start listening to Christmas carols before Halloween and address my Christmas cards about that time too.

4. I will only wear slip on shoes. I even have slip on tennis shoes. I also only own one pair of socks because the need for socks is slim with slip on shoes.

5. I love vapo-rub. I love it so much that I am sometimes secretly glad when I get a little cold because I know I can overdo it with the stuff. It just smells soooo good. A girl on my floor in college would eat it on toast, really she would. That's plain weird, but I have never eaten it, just sniff it like a cokehead even when I am healthy.

6. I kept my kid's umbilical stumps.

7. I had professional portraits done of my dog and cat before kids. See....

and I have ones of them posing by themselves as well. That's not so easy with a cat.

8. I do not wear make-up any longer since I have not worked in over five years. I do, however, have a full drawer of lip balms and lipsticks. It makes me happy to come home from the Target with a new lipstick/balm and I usually do that about once a month. I have some in there that I have had for years that have never been used. I have never counted them, but there must be a hundred.

9. My favorite show ever is Homefront. I bet you've never even seen it. It came on ABC the 93-94 season and stared the dude who is in Friday Night Lights now. It was cancelled after one season and I was heartbroken. I still like to imagine what became of the characters.

Okay, the mission is passed on to: Shane, OneHung,, Lynsey, Michelle, Lori, Kelly Jeanie, Janeen, Mary Ann (who may have already done this one), and Amie, when she returns from vacation.

Saturday, October 21, 2006

I Hate Texas

I hate our neighborhood. With a passion. This is by far the worst place I have ever lived. Even the crappy apartment I lived in during graduate school was in a nicer neighborhood and the people were friendly.

We woke up this morning to find a wet bag of dog shit on top of my husband's truck. The asshole who left it even went so far as to stamp and design (I kid you not) a sweet little note and attach it with a button and curly cue ribbon.

My husband is the only idiot on this damn block who scoops his dog's poop. He has been doing it for the past seven miserable years. Every other schmuck who lives here walks their damn dogs down to the end of the cul-de-sac, into our yard, makes them take a squat, and my husband has to pick up after them as well. This is what we get for being courteous.

I have a pretty good idea who did it. Ironically, they just let their damn pit bull run all over the neighborhood terrorizing all the children and shitting all over our yards. WHEN will my husband realize that we need to move? I hate this place.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Oh, George, say it ain't so!

This news just breaks my heart.

Make me love you then drop the bomb.

Am I then only one who didn't see this coming?

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things I Love About Fall

1. the leaves changing colors

2. football tailgates

3. wearing sweatpants again

4. flannel sheets

5. the abundance of apples

6. the smell of apple butter cooking in the crock pot

7. little boys in sweaters

8. handing out Halloween candy with my good WV neighbor and watching the kids shuffle up the street with their winter coats over their costumes.

9. the chance of a snow day

10. Thanksgiving dinner

11. fresh apple cider

12. the nip in the air and the breezy days

13. mums

Of course, I get nothing but the apples and Thanksgiving dinner here.
Fall just isn't as much fun in the deep south.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

A Day in My Life

Okay, so I was feeling a little badly about myself after reading all the things my friends can accomplish in a day, but then I realized, I have been busy too! I mean, it takes a lot of energy to:

Wake up (before 7, small miracle), shower, and brush teeth before kids bound from bed.

Clean up puke from aforementioned teeth brushing episode.

Spend three minutes in limbo wondering if I should leave bathroom or attempt to puke again "just to get it all" You know what I'm talking about.

Awaken children and serve breakfast, and by breakfast I mean frozen waffle slapped on a plate.

Repeat the words "get dressed", "brush your teeth", "make your bed" twenty times each.

Wrestle to the ground Dress sweetest baby in the whole wide world.

Pile children in vehicle and dodge angry commuters getting child number one to school door safely.

Buy groceries. Eat samples in store. Stock freezer with ready made frozen meals to get us through the next week. Splurge on a banana colada Fuze drink and cool little pretzel sandwiches, yet can't eat either without needing to throw up on the cold tile floor.

Return home and locate Motivated Moms calendar and set to work. Cross off all the things I refuse to do, such as change AC filters and clean out the vehicle. Sit down to rest while thinking of where to start.

Turn on The View just to see Hot Topics. Send baby child off to play independently because it's good for him. Swear I will turn television off after Hot Topics.

Get sidetracked and decide I need to see what Rachael Ray is cooking today.

Get sidetracked again and need to see what the lady on Knitty Gritty is making today, which makes me feel like knitting so I hang in the recliner and knit two rows of crappy baby blanket that will never be finished. Switch to Desperate Housewives on tivo and realize AAGGGHH, the rain from Sunday scrambled the satellite and, thus, no episode.

Go upstairs to email friends to see who might be able to tell me what happened in DH Sunday night and maybe Brothers and Sisters too while they're at it. No reponse yet.

Write scintillating blog entry that is sure to entice many readers while baby pastes millions of Hallmark gold stickers all over himself.

Realize it's time to pick up oldest son, write out tuition check and absence excuse, all late, drop those off in office after retrieving son. Sneak out before anyone can say anything.

Prepare hearty lunch for children consisting of Kid Cuisine, pimento cheese sandwiches, and fruit punch from a can. Am told this is the best lunch ever.

Attempt to scrounge my own lunch but am brought to dry heaves by all in the pantry. Settle on Rice Krispies. Again.

Spend ten minutes wrestling rocking baby child to sleep, lay down and take hour nap with him while big brother enjoys his brand new Thomas DVD and thinks he's getting an awesome privelege.

Wander into computer room and take note of all the things that need organized, thrown out, and cleaned. Keep telling myself I will get right on that.

Watch Lazy Town with oldest kid and laugh for thirty minutes because Robby Rotten called Stingy, Stinky.

Checked on baby man and stuffed couch cover into washer on the way up. Yeah, me!

Spend five minutes unbalancing washing machine.

Had conversation with oldest son about the Cars characters and read the newest book he is developing on the subject.

Played light sabers with youngest son.

Picked up the entire toy room. It is not a waste of a day! Baby child wakes up and along with oldest child proceed to destroy all that was done.

Check emails to see if anyone knows anything about Desperate Housewives. Nope.

Survey the damage in the computer room and decide it's too late in the day to tackle that one and instead watch a rousing episode of Little Bear on Noggin followed by our daily Good Night song ritual which even the dog took part in today. Warm fuzzies all around.

Prepare a nourishing dinner of Kraft Spaghetti in a box while juggling cell phone to talk to my good friend on her way home from work all while trying to change a diaper and ignore begger child who has located something he cannot live without in the newspaper.

Wave goodbye to children and husband, climb into tub, pop two tylenol pms, update my blog, and crawl into bed....ready to try and be more productive tomorrow.

Let the Games Begin

Jacob started soccer this weekend. He has missed two practices and a game due to what we will now call the bypass saga, but he really did do pretty well for a kid who has no idea how to play soccer. It would have been a nice afternoon, too, if he hadn't found the one kid you never want your kid to be around. Now, my kid can be weird. He babbles incessantly, copies television commercials, and makes all sorts of strange noises, but this kid made Jacob look like a choir boy. Jacob learned more stupid phrases and noises and complete idiocy in one short hour than he has all year long in school. Of course, I am always the only one who finds chasing the coach around and smacking him on the ass while yelling "you talking to me?" a bit inappropriate and all the other parents, namely the one belonging to said weird child, found it all endearing and sweet, but crap, I am there for my kid to play soccer not act like a complete buffoon. If he wants to act like a buffoon, he can do that for free in the privacy of our own home and away from unfamiliar adults. Can we just meet some normal children with normal parents?

You know, it's really hard to get a good picture of a kid playing sports. All that moving around I guess. See...he can actually kick the ball. Toward something. While running. Very impressive.

He got to be goalie for a while and it was the perfect position for him. He could use his hands, stand around and rest, and look awesome in his uniform.

Aside from the weird kid, so far so good. They hand out blue powerade at the end, don't ya know, and the uniforms are so cool . I think he might be a little disappointed when he realizes he is going to have to actually play everytime. So that is that...I am officially a soccer mom. Do I get a medal or something?

Monday, October 16, 2006

I Don't Do Monday

I am in a funk. I can't dig myself out of it. I want to lay down and sleep and not get up for days. I want to leave my kids with their dad for an extended period of time and be left completely alone. I have no desire to clean my house, fix a meal, or go anywhere. I am depressed. I have been depressed before, after Jacob was born and at the end of graduate school like 1994 or something and was able to shake it, so I assume will be able to do the same this time, but I feel my funk getting bigger every day and this time I have kids to deal with so that's never good.

I am just mad. Mad at everything and then mad at nothing at all. My kids are driving me crazy because they are just so damn needy and it's not even the necessity needs that drive me nuts, it's the I need more toys, more fun, more undivided attention, more hair to yank, more face to beat, more, more, more. They aren't the only ones. I get email daily from someone wanting me to make meals for someone who just had a baby, or donations for someone's kid's school, or more blood from my turnip and it just grates on my nerves. I know I am totally being selfish here, but not one person did one damn thing for me when I was going through all that hell with my mom. NOT. ONE. PERSON. Now, I didn't really need anything and probably would have turned anything down, but hell, where were the phone calls just to see how my mom was doing? I know every single person at that moms group I belong to knows what happened because I had to inform them I wouldn't be there that Friday to do all the damn jobs I have to do. My friend even told me they brought it up at the meeting, but did any of them call or see how I was doing. Hell no. But, I have sure gotten plenty of emails letting me know not to forget the craft this week and to line up all the day care workers. Bite me. My dad has to go back home to WV this weekend, just like my own husband work comes first in their shallow little world, leaving my mom at the lake ALONE. Alone with her wired together chest, nitroglycerin, and inability to drive. All those friends of hers who wanted to do so much when they thought she might die, now can't even go sit for one day with her because they have to work, have their grandchildren to watch, or have vacations scheduled. I truly understand that people have lives, but you can't spare one day? Of course, she would just roll over and die if she knew I was trying to line up her company for next week because she is convinced she will be just fine there in the boonies all by her lonesome. I, on the other hand, am not so sure. I mean, my Lord, it probably takes her all morning long just to down all the new medications she is now on. What if she were to choke on it all. Oy, just the thought.

How did it become late October? I have Halloween to get ready for too. Can we skip it this year? Would that totally destroy my kid's psyche if we did that? Geez. Of course, the dad signed us up for some ridiculous fall festival at church that seemed like a good idea at the time, but now just seems expensive and bothersome. Oh, and did I mention it's at "our" church? The same church that hasn't called or emailed to ask how my mom is doing or even how my church going husband is doing. The same one that decided not to put my name in the bulletin on my birthday or acknowledge we have Adam, sweetest kid of all time when he's not pulling your hair or poking your eyes out. I really don't want to go to that middle aged high school, but I know we will and we'll pour out tons of money and do tons of work and no one will say thank you or talk to us, just take our candy and run, just like every other time.

I think the whole, "we're moving to Ohio, psych, no we're not" thing has set me off. I think I was okay with it at first, but now that we are in mid-October, about that time we would be packing up and moving out, I am getting a little bitter. Not at my husband, it wasn't a good move for him at the time and he did truly do what he thought was best, but I was so, so, so looking forward to moving. I was really eager (just, for you Sadie) to experience the change of seasons, see the leaves turn colors, play with the dog in the snow, move into a nicer neighborhood, maybe make some friends. It was going to be great. Now it's all just a faded dream and I sit here still with tomorrow's forecast to be in the nineties while I melt away in my little funk. Ohio State is number 1 in the country right now, it really would have been good times. Sigh.

You will have to forgive my funkiness. Hopefully it will be short lived this time. Maybe if blogger will ever let me post some dang pictures I can enlighten you with my son's first attempt at athleticism or just how seriously cute my youngest son is...I mean, really he is. There must be supermodel genes in my lineage somewhere. Why Baby Gap hasn't come calling is beyond me. Oh, and were you able to see Steve Slayton pull it out against Syracuse on Saturday? If he isn't nominated for the Heismann it will be a travesty. I, of course, couldn't see it because I live in Texas and they don't televise good number five ranked football here, but I did thoroughly enjoy the whooping that Auburn gave Florida, and I am not that big of an Auburn fan, being a semi LSU fan by association. Now if Baylor could have just pulled it out against Texas I might be a happy camper. No offense to all you Texas fans, but I am all Texas'd out at the moment and might barf if I see anymore burnt orange.

Friday, October 13, 2006

For Lack of Anything Better to Say......

As I was attempting to rustle up some dinner the other night and cruising through the old cook book, I found a recipe I hadn't prepared for some time and whipped it up. I am now craving it about as much as I am craving that blue cheese chopped salad from Outback and thought since I love it so much, you might as well, so I am sharing it with you.

This recipe was given to me by one of my third grade students back in 1997. After hastily doing the math, I think I have figured she graduated high school last year or maybe this year, but still, she was a sweet little nine year old girl back then, the cutest one I have ever seen, what I imagined I would be raising at this point in my life. LOL. Anyway, we used to do Student of the Week where they got to have all kinds of neat priveleges like returning all the library books each morning and using my pencil (you would be surprised at how much kids want to use the teacher's pencils) and they had an entire poster displayed with the weekly student's picture and all their favorite things. So where every other kid in the class listed pizza as their favorite food, this little girl lists Sundown Oven Pancake. Of course, I had to inquire. Cheese, veggies, and a pancake. Okay. Sounds interesting. The next day she brings me the recipe, painstakingly printed in her finest pencil handwriting on plain white paper with a tendency to lean toward the right. I am sure it took her a half hour to complete. She really wanted me to try it and although it called for broccoli (bad, bad, very bad) I did cook it, sans the horrid green vegetable and found it to be just as awesome as she had described. In fact, there was a time in my life, living alone and half broke, where I made it three or four times a week and ate it daily. It was that good. So here it is:

Sundown Oven Pancake

1 T butter
1/2 cup flour
1/2 cup milk
2 eggs
1/4 tsp. salt
2 T butter
2 cups broccoli florets
1 cup chopped red onion
1 cup chopped green pepper
1 cup chopped ripe tomato
1/4 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
2 cups shredded cheddar cheese

Heat oven to 425. In a nine inch pie pan melt 2 T butter in oven. Meanwhile in a small bowl stir together flour, milk, eggs, and 1/4 tsp. salt. Pour into pie pan with melted butter. Bake for 12-15 minutes or until golden brown. In a large skillet melt 2 T butter. Add remaining ingredients except cheese. Cook over medium heat, stirring occasionally until vegetables are crisply tender, about 12 minutes. Sprinkle 1/2 cup cheese in bottom of pancake; top with vegetable mixture. Sprinkle with remaining cheese. Return to oven; continue baking for five minutes until cheese is melted.

For the health conscious and those just coming off bypass surgery, you can skip the butter altogether and use cooking spray.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Warning: Much Bitchiness Ahead

I am in a mood. I am mad at people today. I am having issue with myself for it, as I know I should be elated and thankful that my mom is no longer facing the grim reaper, but still, I feel absolute disgust for all persons, especially those in the Houston area.

I have never met so many rude people in one area in all my life. I am guessing that it is because we live in such a big city now, but truly, does everyone I encounter have to be rude? Rudeness is one of my biggest pet peeves. I wasn't brought up to be that way. I was taught manners and politeness and how to help others and have lived my life that way, even when I didn't feel like it. I would like the same courtesy extended to myself, it's just common decency. This is what I have encountered in the past two days:

Driving to pick up my son from school I make the stupid decision to pass a man who was driving below the speed limit in the left lane. Apparently it is a rule in Texas that the slow lane is the left lane because everyone does it, but I think it is my prerogative to speed if I so desire so I pass him. Well, men get ticked off when women pass them, I notice this everytime. They speed up to keep you from doing it usually, but that's the extent, until yesterday. This man apparently had his ego bruised by the dented SUV with sunshades passing his megatruck and I ended up having to pass him at 85 in a 35 just to get around him then he proceeded to ride my ass all the way to my intersection then pull beside me, roll down his window, call me a bunch of names and threaten to kill me. All while chomping on a huge hamburger. Nice. I didn't do anything at first, ignored the asshole, but it was a long light and I eventually rolled down my window and smiled at him and told him at least I wasn't fat. If you want to piss someone off, say that. The guy followed me all the way to Jacob's school, which is at a church. He didn't do anything but sit there and stare menacingly while chomping that burger, but WTF? He's allowed to spew obscenities at me and I am in the wrong for defending myself? Whatever. Beginning of bad mood....

So my mom almost died last week, remember that? I am a little jittery as a result and my worry limit is extremely lowered at the moment so when I couldn't get her on the phone last evening I started to panic. After ten minutes of silent wonder I decide to call back and search for her and as I reach for the phone I get a phone call instead from a one Robert Jones from here in town, at least that is what my caller id states. I answer it and it's some nine or ten year old girl giving me the refrigerator running schtick and not well, my first instinct was to laugh and correct her, but my blood pressure was up and I didn't have time for that crap so I told her to hang up and not call back. So she called back. I hung up. She called back again and tried the Prince Albert in a can, yet it was Prince Harry and she couldn't remember the rest and then I got pissed. I told her loudly. DO. NOT. CALL. THIS. NUMBER. AGAIN. She called again. I let it ring and then I called Robert Jones at the number on my caller id and asked for a mother, no mother but I got a dad, told him he needed to have his daughter quit calling my number because I needed to use the phone BECAUSE IN MY MIND IT WAS AN EMERGENCY and he was like, "well, which daughter?" I don't know dude, just keep your daughters off my phone. I was nice about it too, told him I might find that funny any other day, but not that day and please, please, please never call my house again. Then he lets me know that he doesn't find that a real problem, his kids were just having a little fun where I then told Robert Jones that if it kept up I would press charges against HIM, since his name kept showing up, for phone harrassment. Choice words again. His poor little girls, so misunderstood. Bite me. Bad mood escalates......

Go to small grocery store, not the one I typically go to, and find it is FULL of people, should have known then to leave. I didn't leave. I had my feet run over, my cart shoved out of the way WITH MY BABY IN IT, and at least three women get in a complete huff because I had the audacity to stop and actually take a product from the aisle. You know I am rude like that. Then they tried to charge me the wrong prices for just about everything I bought and the heavily perfumed chicky behind me had a big old hissy fit because she couldn't buy her Reeses Cups and Dr. Pepper fast enough.

Now as I type someone, don't know who, has parked their car in my driveway, somebody's, don't know whose, kids are playing in my yard trampling all our bushes and bouncing balls off our windows. This has been going on daily for the past seven years. We are apparently the neighborhood playground. It wouldn't bother me at all if the kids would be nice to my kid, but they aren't. They are downright mean and their parents are okay with that so we just keep him inside or in the back yard. It really sucks.

So, where I am extremely grateful that my mom is doing allright (still in the hospital, oxygen levels aren't great and she may have a touch of pneumonia and wont' be coming home anytime soon, but still, she's alive) I just don't have the tolerance for this kind of crap this week....or maybe not any more weeks. I am tired of being the nice one, I am tired of people running all over me and my kids, Is there a friendlier place because I want to go there, I want to experience manners and cheerfulness, and a helping hand now and then. I am nearing the end of what I can take here. Husband be warned.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006


Tell me if you find this odd......

Since Jacob had been absent for two days last week and seeing as how he has been through a somewhat traumatic experience, I thought I would walk Jacob into his classroom this morning to speak with his teacher and give her a heads up to what's been going on the past few days. We ended up arriving late due to stinky, eight wipe diaper at the get go, so I was hesitant to go in for fear of disrupting the morning routine. School begins at 8:15 and the nice man has informed us many times through meetings and newsletters to pretty much be the hell out of the building by then. We showed up at 8:25, but I felt it was important to speak with the teacher given the situation so I forged ahead, I mean, shoot, I took a shower and everything. So I very quietly head in that room, ten minutes after start time remember, and find six other mothers just hovering around the room, beaming at their little angels, and just kind of there. I was wondering if I missed some sort of party or what not but still, I approached the teacher's desk and had to wait in line to speak with her as there were three other mothers waiting to speak with her as well. OOOKKKKAAAYYYY........so I can't help but over hear and one mother wants to know what kind of lunch her kid should bring for the field trip this week (you know what your kid likes to eat was teacher's response LOL), another asked if she could help be the room mother (already have one but you are welcome to help, just ask that lady over in the corner), and the next lady just wanted to ask how the teacher was doing and how her weekend went (blank stare). By this time it is well after 8:30, I know the teacher is wondering what gem I have to share, but she was genuinely concerned about Jacob and my mom and glad I let her know what was going on, we spoke about two minutes and I turned around and left. I didn't even wave good bye to my kid as he was already engrossed in some writing practice and really didn't seem to notice that I was there at all. I was the first mother to leave. Yes, I left after 8:30 and there were still about ten mothers there and another one walking in the door as I was leaving. What the hell is up with that? Now, I am clingy mother......my kids have never stayed with a babysitter, I watch their every move like a hawk, and I monitor everything they eat, drink, watch, or read. I fully expected to want to walk Jacob in daily as well, but I knew that wasn't good for him. In fact, he is so independent he has been dropped off and cheerfully going in alone since day two. It has never even occured to me that I should sit beside him for half an hour each morning and pat his hand and get his bag unpacked for him, yet I am apparently the only mother who thinks that way. I noticed when I went to chapel that the other mothers seemed to know one another real well and I wondered how that came about and now I see. They have a little coffee klatch right there in the classroom each morning.....very, very weird. I thought it might be an isolated incident, but the same thing happened yesterday morning when I walked in and found a substitute there.

Do you think I should say something about this? The teacher is wonderful and Jacob loves her so I don't want to tick her off, but I kind of get the impression that them being there is a bit of a nuisance to her. I kind of feel that this is an intrusion into my child's educational day and since I am paying for it I should say something, but I don't want to be the bitchy, gripy woman. Am I making too much out of this?

Monday, October 09, 2006

Short and Sweet

Here's an update:

My mom had double bypass surgery on Friday afternoon. After much monitering and testing and a night in the scariest hospital I have ever been in, they found she had some significant blockage in a main artery and apparently some sort of hereditary malfunction, which is most likely what killed all her siblings as well. We wanted her moved back to Houston, to the finest heart hospital in the country, but they were afraid she wouldn't survive the transfer so, obviously, she stayed in small town hospital for the procedure. She is doing pretty well right now. She is still in ICU, but they expect to move her to the regular floor this evening. We are home, my mom insisted that Jacob miss no more school, so I grudgingly obliged. My dad is there and my sister will be there through today and we will take it one day at a time from there. She will need a lot of care for the next two or three months, apparently cracking your chest open is pretty painful and can lead to all sorts of complications, so she is homebound for a while. We haven't figured out all the logistics, she can't go back to West Virginia for at least a month, but at this point we are all just so thrilled she is still alive we will do just about anything they ask us to do.

This was one of the worst things I have ever had to deal with. The four hours my mom was back in that surgery were the slowest and most painful of my life. I think I cried about as much those three days as I ever have in my whole life put together. The worst part was that one of the tests required shooting some radioactive dye into her heart...that is how they found the blockage. As a result, me being knocked up and all, I couldn't go within ten feet of her for SEVENTY TWO hours. I could not hug my mom before they wheeled her into that OR, I couldn't even hug her good bye last night. It was so cruel. All I could think in that little room with the big green phone was "What if....and I didn't even hug her" Soooooo........for all that, this little dude better be my best behaved yet....he owes me!

Thank you all for your prayers and good wishes. You don't even know how much it means to me to know that people I have never formally met took the time to pray for my mom in her biggest time of need. I am forever grateful and glad to "know" everyone of you.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006


Well, crap.

I just got a call that my mom is in a back woods hospital possibly having a heart attack. Nothing like a little shock to the heart to wake you right up. We will be up there for a while.

All those little problems I just bitched about...nothing, forgotten. I am sick.

Blah, Blah, Blah

My mom left yesterday. Oh, woe is me. I have now had to step up and start raising my children again......oh, I am so tired.

You know what? I have been tired my entire life. I cannot remember a time when I was well rested. In elementary school I slept entire weekends away, catching up from the early school hours. In high school I was a walking zombie from waking up at 6 am to curl my 80s doo and make it to school on time. In college I learned very quickly not to schedule classes before 10 and if it were the only time it were offered, I typically skipped it scraping by with C's when I could have been making A's. I even had a summer job once where I drove the five minute drive back to my dorm room and napped my entire lunch hour, never once eating lunch. I chose the location of our honeymoon because there weren't many activities, therefore guaranteeing a nap every afternoon....no, I am not kidding. I am tired. That is all there is to it. I have tried caffeine, exercise, the ten glasses of water a day thing, a diet of no carbs, meats, or sugars, vegetarianism, aromatherapy, and anything else short of a frontal lobotomy and shock therapy. Nothing works. I am destined to be sleepy all of my life. I have no idea how I will be able to function with three children, especially one that will be keeping me up at night. I want to fast forward to retirement when I can sleep until noon again.

I feel sorry for my kids, I really do try to keep them entertained and busy but since I have had this parasite feeding off me for the past few weeks I have had absolutely no energy whatsoever to do anything remotely fun or even useful. My house is only clean right now because my mom cleaned it, but it is already on it's way to complete chaos again. I have lost two checks and the downloading attachments to the camera because they are somewhere buried on my desk from, oh say, eight weeks worth of non organizing. I haven't made a from scratch meal in at least three weeks. FYI: SuperTarget has cheap and good frozen dinners. Do you know what we are having tonight? The five for five Arby's roast beef sandwiches and quite possibly a can of veggies if I can muster up enough energy to run the can opener. I suck. I am a horrible mother right now and it really upsets me. I try to drag myself outside to run and play but then find myself slumped over in the hammock hoping for some piece and quiet. I know my husband is mad at me, he came in last night whistling, twitching, and popping veins when he saw that shepherds pie in the tell tale frozen tin. He always whistles when he is pissed at me. If I hear him whistle one more time I am going to explode. How unfair is it that he can go about his life like nothing is happening, drink his wine and coffee and eat three huge meals a day without puking and still wonder why I am so tired when he wakes up earlier than me. GGGGRRRRRR. Now that's not to say he doesn't help, he actually does help out a whole lot, he just doesn't do it in that cheerful, I would do anything for you way that my mom does. My poor, poor mom. She did way more than any 62 year old woman should be doing and if she didn't have, like, a colonoscopy and heart scan scheduled next week she would still be here keeping my kids company until I dig myself out of this blood sucking funk I am in. I actually got some good pictures of them all together this time and would post them if I knew where in the hell my camera doodads were. Can you just go out and buy those things or do I need a whole new camera? Crap.

Well, I didn't mean for this to be a miserable post. I guess I could tell you how my kid sang the school fight song at chapel this morning with the rest of his class and although I didn't get any pictures for all the rest of the mamas shoving me out of the way, I was able to hear him louder than the rest and he knew ALL the words. I wouldn't have been able to download the pictures anyway.....I could also tell you how at least three of the little girls have crushes on him, I can tell by the way they wave at him and bat their eyes at him and I wasn't upset at all that he ran off away from me after chapel to walk hand in hand with one of them....well, not too upset. At least it was a cute girl. Is it Friday yet?

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

What is Wrong With People?

This turned my stomach. What makes people want to terrorize children? What is wrong with people?

Is any one else afraid to drop their kids off at school this week?

I am fully aware that there are millions of schools in this country and the odds of something so horrific happening at my kid's school are like one in a billion, but still.

I have issues with Jacob's school because each and every morning at least eighty percent of the parents walk their kids into the school. We were told in no uncertain terms that after the third day of school you were to be dropping them off at the door, but no, two months later same old parents walking those kids right to the classroom and no one says a word. These aren't just kindergarten parents either, I see plenty of teenagers being escorted in as well. It used to just be a nuisance with the parents parking their cars all willy nilly everywhere, and quite humorous to watch the same woman get out with her sweat shorts and Budweiser tee shirt each morning, but now I consider this a safety issue. With the sheer amount of adults wandering in and out of that building each day, any crack head weirdo could case the joint and see that he could get in just as easily with no questions asked. Visitors are supposed to go to the office and sign in and get an id tag to wear while you are in the building and that is all fine and good on paper, but last week when I went to chapel with my kid I was the ONLY one with an id tag and there were plenty of parents there. I pay a lot of money to send my kid to that school. I like his teacher and he is having the time of his life there, but I fully intend to make an appointment with the headmaster and give him my opinion on this issue. I am giving him through the end of the week to realize on his own that he needs to step up and enforce the rules, after that, watch out dude, I don't back down easily where my kid is concerned.