This is what happens when you leave your laptop open while you're scouring the house for your lost car keys.
Which, by the way, I totally found. Twelve hours later. Or more accurately, Adam found when he finally told me where he put them.
He had no idea all day long where those keys where. Even after I promised him a brand spanking new Optimus Prime if he found them, he'd just shrug and say, "Me not know!" and go about his business. Shoot, he even patted my back at one point and told me it would all be okay and all that time he knew where they were!
His story is that while I was drying my hair Elizabeth pushed a chair over to the counter and snagged my keys where I had left them when we came in the door. He knew she wasn't supposed to play with them so he took them from her and threw them wwwwaaaayyyy in the back of one of the kitchen cabinets so she couldn't find them.
Or anyone else either.
And I guess he forgot all about doing that until 9 p.m. when his Daddy asked him, after his own car key search, if he knew where Elizabeth put the keys when all of sudden he jumped up, went to the cabinet, and pulled them out.
My husband thinks I'm an idiot for not finding them and staying trapped in my house all day long while my kid rode home with a classmate at the last minute.
But he didn't find them either, so there.
But now I and my computer have keys again, so all is right with the world.
And as if I weren't lucky enough to have those all those keys back again, we went to a the company Christmas party this weekend without the children and we won a most awesome door prize
Those flowers are so pretty, huh?
But did you see my most awesome new camera?
We won a frickin' camera, man! It's a Nikon Coolpix and it's going to make me all cool like Ashton Kucher. Free = Cool.
And I also brought home a nice hefty hangover as well because forty year old Mommy can't drink like Twenty-two year old Girl-Without-Children could. The husband tried to warn me, but I don't get out much and they totally had an eighties cover band so the line between old me and this me was pretty hazy.
Note to self: Five beers is plenty. Seven will kill you the next day. And just don't drink at all if you have to drive eighty miles to a kid's birthday party the next day. Trust me on this one.
And now I need to spend the week baking and viewing the six hour defensive driving video before the end of the year so I don't get arrested.
I'll just be sure to close my computer and put my car keys away before I do it.
All my life I thought I'd be the perfect mother. I even majored in it. I aced all the child development classes I took toward my degree in, wait for it, Early Childhood Development and Elementary Education.
And then they were born. First Jacob, who is 8, then Adam, who is 4, and our biggest surprise, Elizabeth who is 2.
As much as I really wanted to be, I am finding out I am no June Cleaver. For starters, The Beav never had a baby sister.