Gawd, I hate Halloween!
Even as a child, I just never understood why in the world people would want to knock on their neighbor's door and beg for candy. It boggles the mind, really. A holiday where we ask our neighbors for outrageously priced goodies and if they don't oblige, we vandalize their property and the cops take a vacation for a night. I still don't get it.
But of course, if everyone else is doing it.....
Anyway, in case you didn't already know it, Halloween is NOT my favorite holiday. Maybe I'd like it in a nicer neighborhood, but I just don't enjoy a day where the hoodlums are actually allowed to cause a ruckus. And the fact that I used the word ruckus, just shows you how old and unHalloweeny I've become.
We took the kids to the church for the annual shindig. Thankfully, we were not involved in the handing out of candy this year, so I didn't have to educate the urban youth on the value of politeness and good manners. I did feel sorry for the poor saps who did though. I mean, how freaking hard would it be to have your kids say thank you to the old people funding their sugar high? And again, please respect the No scary costume sign. If I wanted my kid to see someone with open guts or ten year old prostitutes, we would have trick-or-treated at the trauma center downtown. I am surprised that we were neither egged nor poop-bagged this year, because when we returned home the begging was still in full force and we spent the evening trodding around in the dark since we had no candy, didn't want to keep the kids up, and dang, shouldn't Halloween have a time limit? If we turned on a light, the kids (and adults) were drawn like moths and kept ringing the bell as if they would just melt on the doorstep if they didn't get one more fricking candy bar. Have you tried bathing a baby in the dark? It ain't easy. Yeah, Halloween isn't my favorite holiday.
But I had a banana and bananas are delicious:
How can it be Halloween again? We still have candy leftover from last year. I remember only having boys to wrestle last year. Only two. How did we make it without the girl?
Yes, I had no bananas last year.
But now I do and for that I am glad.
Thanks, Pittsburgh CLO
21 hours ago