One Day I'll Sleep Again

They say women forget the minute details of pregnancy and giving birth so that they will be willing to repeat the process over and over to populate the world. Some sort of primal thing or something. I don't know if that is completely true because I do remember the agonizing pain of contractions, the messed up c-section and complete meltdown I had two years ago, and the days of wondering if I would ever feel my left leg again, yet I did forget some very important details about being pregnant. The first one, obviously, was just how horrible it is to puke daily for months on end and the second, which is just now coming to light for me is the insomnia. Oh, my wretched hell.

For the past couple of weeks I have been awake between 1:30 and 4:30 every single night. My husband awakens at 5 making as much racket as humanly possible while trying not to make noise for almost an hour and then kids are up by 6:30 typically so essentially I am getting about three hours a sleep a night. I am tired. I am cranky. I need some sleep. Oh, what I wouldn't give for a vidodin right now. So, yeah, it really is 2:49 a.m.

Anywho.....

My husband has a weird little quirk (well, many, but this is just one)......he awakens in the middle of the night and invades the kitchen and scarfs whatever is available. Sometimes he is awake (and he swears he is) but other times I have caught him so zombie like that I know he is sleeping and he usually doesn't remember doing it the next day. I have learned to hide anything I really covet in my upstairs closet, sick I know, but I was getting tired of waking up disappointed to find Butterfinger wrappers all over the table and all my limited edition Holiday Spice Pepsi that can no longer be found sucked dry. I saw a piece on 20/20 a couple years ago about people who regularly do this and they have found a link to this behavior and eventual onset of multiple sclerosis in some. Interesting. Something else I will have to look out for as I already worry he is developing early alzheimers because he can never remember anything I say to him.

So.....I spent all day Saturday and some of Sunday baking. I was a baking fool. I cranked my Christmas tunes and sent my family away and baked eleven different kinds of cookies and candies. I was a regular Betty Crocker. I wanted to give some away and then bring the rest up to the lake to have handy because I know my parents will have visitors this weekend and into next week and I didn't want my mom worrying about what to prepare. I had TONS of goodies..........(notice it says had?)

As I was putting the breakfast (and lunch) dishes in the dishwasher I noticed my festive red and green dishes. I looked over in the corner, behind the mixer where I thought I was hiding them, and found most of my creations totally gone. The best molasses cookies in the world...gone. The thumbprints that he said he didn't like.....all gone. The pizzelles, a few left but in shambles. The only thing that survived was some peanut butter fudge and some toffees that I placed in a tight inconspicuous can. I felt like Ralphie's dad when he realized they wouldn't be having turkey for Christmas dinner. No Christmas cookies! Say it ain't so. The kids and I didn't even get to taste them. Grrrrr.



But I have that nice refrigerator magnet........

Yeah, must be nice.