A couple of weeks ago I attended an alumni dinner for my old college sorority and enjoyed my child free hours amidst the wine
I noticed early on, like at my wedding reception, that having that first baby is very important to others. I don't know if it was because I was thirty when I took the plunge or if everyone gets that, but a month after the wedding people were pretty forward with their questions about our future children. Fast forward almost two years later when that first baby was born and everyone was relieved and happy and letting me know that baby needed a sister and we better get on that right away because, you know it's a fact, your family isn't complete until you have one of each. Yes, we got a lot of that. As if you can place your order at the counter of God and He just send down what you desire. So number two arrived and according to some, he did not possess the right parts. Some gave us the old, "you need to try for a girl" like, when my son was twelve hours old and the rest just assumed that the government allotted our 2 point something something kids so we were done, no "perfect" family for us. Imagine everyone's complete surprise (including mine) when we announced we would spawn number three. The looks. The confusion. The shaking of heads. Three children? How can that be? We got a lot, and still do, of "you know what causes that don't you?" or, my favorite, "Are you Catholic?" It amazes me, but I still get a good laugh from it. The wine loving lady seated next to me at that dinner hit it head on, having more than two kids these days is almost unheard of and people do tend to wonder, WHY a family would venture into that realm. My grandmother had three children seventy some years ago and got the complete opposite reaction. She was not living up to her womanly duties by not having two handfuls of kids. I, on the other hand, am considered either saintly for "putting up with so much" but more often stupid or h*orny for allowing it to happen in the first place. My goodness what would happen if I had a fourth or even a fifth child?
Really, these comments and thoughts don't bother me. It's my family and if I want three kids or six kids, that's my choice (well, and the husband gets a little say). I do hate that some people think we are getting it on twice a day while ignoring our kids because that is so not the case but, whatever. I am sure my husband doesn't mind it. I do mind when people tell me, in front of my boys, that it will be a shame if we don't have a girl because, heaven forbid, we have another stinking boy, but that is a whole other post entirely. Don't even get me started on that one.